Bumped into an old classmate yesterday at the mall. We started talking and she happened to mention that she works for the Open University. I told her of my interest to finish college when she dropped the bomb. She said they're offering a new course - the one I've always wanted but one they didn't offer when I started college because the concept didn't exist then. She said that if I can pass the requirements, she will help me to process my papers.
I was excited.
I was terrified.
I want it.
But I can't afford it.
But a diploma at last.
But it also means school work on top of two jobs.
It means studying on your own for three years.
It means I will have a chance to get a better job or get promoted when I graduate.
Hay! It's the coward in me cloaked in practicality and reasoning.
Conversations with the Viking:
me: should I or shouldn't I? I'm too old to go back to school.
Viking: you'll never be too old for that
me: so u think i should enroll? i will have to keep my two jobs to afford it. So It's gonna take a lot of work. and might continue for three years
Viking: of cause you should
me: im terrified but I really want it
Viking: as long as it wont kill you
me: what if it does? then all the work will go to waste
Viking: but two jobs and then lots of work on top of it. Can you manage?
me: At least I tried right? Finishing school is part of my top ten wish list. I thought that if I can't get the other nine, I tried to get at least one
Viking: well right
me: and die trying LOL
me: the irony
Viking: the text on your tombstone: DON'T THINK YOU CAN KEEP ME DOWN HERE!
me: LOL. I like that one :)
Encouragement comes in the strangest words sometimes.