Aja!

My new battle cry for the moment.

In one of my comfort trips to my friends house, after the usual feed-the-down-trodden ritual (a great cheese sandwich roll cooked right there for me, ice cream and Oreos), we sat down for several hours to mourn, laugh and burn out all the usual libak-the-fafalicious of the world.

I had a special treat that day. My friend sent me home with a San Francisco t-shirt and a whole pile of Korean Telenovelas with good english sub-titles.

I hate watching telenovelas on tv. I can't stand not knowing what happens next. After Criminal Minds decided to blow up one of the agent's black cars without us knowing which agent got killed was uurrrrgggghhhhhh ... just eeeeeevil! Good thing we forgot the suspense by watching Danny Crane! Sigh. Not having cable tv is not so bad as long as you get a steady stream of tv series on dvds - hehehe.

Anyway, back to Korean telenovelas. Finished watching Lovers in Paris (Aja!)

and My Girl.


Can't help but love both. Takes you back to Pride and Prejudice - Korean style. Because I couldn't stop watching it, I went around work floating. I didn't get much sleep just watching both series. It was almost torture not being able to watch it. It was that addicting. My sisters and I all went to bed hesitantly at 2am. We had to peel ourselves off the sofa so we could work the next morning or force ourselves to turn off the dvd player. I wouldn't recommend them on busy days. But sigh, I love them.

Aja!

Bansai!

me: Hey, I just got a log distance call from the US, another possible website employer asked when I'll be free. As in he called my phone to make sure I respond to his email. Naks. Kudog my heart. Be careful what you wish for all over again?

friend: Hahahaha.. Ay sinabi.. Be careful what you wish for gid eh.. I'm very happy for you missy.. As in!

me: I'm very afraid for me hahaha. As in I'm terrified I just might succeed or someone might discover what a fake I am.

friend: Talaga ito. Why do you say that? It's not like you're pretending to be somebody you're not

me: Not being a college graduate does that to you. Ruins your self-confidence when placed on a race with nitwits bearing diplomas.

friend: Duh! My brother also do not have a college diploma but he is now a service engineer in New York. He knows all of the insides of their machines that's why he was now tasked to do the company's operations manual. Output ang important not degrees.

me: Sigh. I know. Thanks friend. Just needed to get that one out before I panic. Will keep that in mind.

friend: Talaga ito. Dami mo na nga clients and super satisfied lahat. Talaga ito. Bansai lang bala!

me: Bansai!

Did I tell you how great my friends are?

Be careful what you ask for?

I sometimes fall into a bad habit of feeling sorry for myself. I try to snap out of it when I can. I know that it doesn't lead to any good and it contradicts my philosophy about the laws of attraction.

First, I was physically sick and had to be absent again from work - asthma, coughing, nausea, diarrhea, vomiting, fever. I had to take medicines with side effects of the same. Second to that, I have never received so much job orders all in one week. Eight all at once. I had to turn down some of them. Third, there is added stress of the state of the house after the flood. It is literally falling apart. Having no bedroom door is no joke at all. And fifth, we had an alumni homecoming taking place that weekend. So it was no surprise that after that week, I got pretty stressed out and could not hold anything down. The two good things that came out of it, was I was forced to get tests and lost some weight without much effort.

I'm back at work now and feeling much better. My first foreign job ended the week I was sick - quite short and I'm ashamed of not being able to do it right. But my body couldn't take it anymore. I'm currently finishing 3/4 of my second foreign job. And this one I'm quite proud of. Have two pending website jobs awaiting data (which reminds me, I have to redo my contracts), another one coming in and two more print jobs. To say I'm busy is an understatement. But I've learned to force myself to relax. I don't do any work if I feel bad about something. I am never productive or inspired when I'm stressed. And I did say that my own business is supposed to be enjoyable because I have passion for it. I promised myself I will stop when it stops being fun. And my last two weeks was no fun at all. But I am meeting deadlines and schedules of present jobs which is a good sign.

I've been trying not to turn down jobs. With the state of the house, I really need a large amount to fix it. But if it would end to me getting sick again, I will gladly turn it down. I'm going to put health first because being sick is definitely not enjoyable.

I started out feeling good about the jobs I'm getting. But I got so stressed, I wonder if this is God mocking me. Be careful what you wish for?

At the very least, I now have proof that the law of attraction works. Hahaha. And yes, I will be more careful what I ask for next time :)