Weakness

I have a weakness for very tall long haired men with glasses sporting cameras like human appendage. Well, just one guy really. Did you know he owns a Leica? And a Canon DSLR. And a Nikon. And this old Polaroid cam.

I have yet to see his shots. Those I have seen were not that impressive to me so he has yet to prove himself. But oh shit, doesn't he look good with it.

Browsing actually makes you more productive to a point ...

Here's an article sent to me by my sister to justify internet browsing at work. I agree to a point. It's addicting and if you don't know when to stop, it does become more of a hindrance than a help. So ... read on.

Facebook, YouTube at work make better employees: study
* Posted on - Thu Apr 2, 2009 10:13AM EDT
MELBOURNE (Reuters) - Caught Twittering or on Facebook at work? It'll make you a better employee, according to an Australian study that shows surfing the Internet for fun during office hours increases productivity.

The University of Melbourne study showed that people who use the Internet for personal reasons at work are about 9 percent more productive that those who do not.

Study author Brent Coker, from the department of management and marketing, said "workplace Internet leisure browsing," or WILB, helped to sharpened workers' concentration.

"People need to zone out for a bit to get back their concentration," Coker said on the university's website (www.unimelb.edu.au/)

"Short and unobtrusive breaks, such as a quick surf of the Internet, enables the mind to rest itself, leading to a higher total net concentration for a days' work, and as a result, increased productivity," he said.

According to the study of 300 workers, 70 percent of people who use the Internet at work engage in WILB.

Among the most popular WILB activities are searching for information about products, reading online news sites, playing online games and watching videos on YouTube.

"Firms spend millions on software to block their employees from watching videos, using social networking sites or shopping online under the pretence that it costs millions in lost productivity," said Coker. "That's not always the case."

However, Coker said the study looked at people who browsed in moderation, or were on the Internet for less than 20 percent of their total time in the office.

"Those who behave with Internet addiction tendencies will have a lower productivity than those without," he said.

(Writing by Miral Fahmy; Editing by Valerie Lee)

Kun diin ka masaya

susuportahan ta ka.

Had a short IM conversation with my niece who is in a middle of a crossroad right now. She's hilarious when she's cynical. Anyway, I won't be translating the hiligaynon words. The conversation is better off without it. Just wanted to post it for posterity. I hope she doesn't read my blog LOL!

niece: Hey Tita
me: Hi k, waddup?
niece: News
me: Did u get in?
niece: Didn't pass. So i googled 'the test'. And read about all these other kids who didn’t pass so I’m pretty happy right now. Seriously, I did
me: wow
niece: I like to swallow other people's misery to diminish my own
me: hahaha. Their loss
niece: But im okay. i was expecting this already
me: Cge lang a, so what now? Stay with present course or move on to other things?
niece: BA lit sa Miami. I’m gonna shift! Actually, I wanted to try speech comm sa Diliman but tapos na ang application period. Anyway, ara ku sa lost period ku so my parents gave me another college talk kagina. And I bet we're gonna have another one this evening. I can feel it.
me: Hell, I was lost too. Anyway, You go with your heart a. You’ll find your niche sooner or later. Just hope its sooner than later LOL
niece: Don’t worry tita. May fall-back pa ku. Ma artista na lng ku. Hambal ni nong arnold
me: hahahaha. AWAT!
niece: Kung co-star ku mn lng si John Lloyd.................why not. But I’ll probably play his daughter or something
niece: kidding
me: hehehe. ok man lang na. with ur manipulative powers, u can convince him your something else
niece: ha-ha. Seriously, though. Daw lost ku subong. One thing's for sure. I do not want to be a doctor – nooooooooooooo.
me: It’s a start. Better to know what you don’t want than end up with "WTF was I thinking?"
niece: yeah. But i have to find something soon. Or else I'll have to marry
me: BWAHAHAHAHA
niece: para lang may masagod sakon
me: now that i s FUNNNNNY
niece: peru amu gd na bala gina-isip ku
me: maybe u should try being a commediane
niece: I mean, I've been hoping I don't have to marry. I wanna take care of myself and dote on my nieces and nephews
me: no worries. 1. You don’t have nephews and nieces yet. 2. You can start with just selling your drawings. I tell u, they're good
niece: Maybe. Anyway, I still have a lot of thinking to do
me: gotta get back to work now. Just nod a lot when ur parents start talking to u? LOL. Thats what i did
niece: I say stuff to when they're not talking
niece: anyway, cge tita. bye
me: bye

The negation of self

I was cleaning the closet today and while trying doubly hard to accept that I can no longer fit in my favorite clothes, with grief I folded them and surrendered them as hand-me-downs to the next generation. I kept them because I believed that I would one day lose weight and surprise myself. But today, I decided that should I ever lose the weight I've been planning to lose, I will just buy new clothes. When did I decided on the new clothes? It was when I realized I am having difficulty losing the weight.

The train of thought went on to other things. I used to wear jewelry - earrings, mostly - and a rare occasion for bracelets and necklaces and even rings. I can't remember when I stopped wearing jewelry but I know while I could still be comfortable with earrings, I would limit wearing other jewelry to occasions where I must/I should/I am expected wear one. I stopped wearing jewelry, I think, because I couldn't really afford the real ones. And the fakes were just ... well, too fake. So I guess I decided I'm better off without them.

I used to wear a watch. When my mother's watch broke, I decided I didn't need a new one since the cellphone tells me the time anyway.

And this brought a terrible thought. When did I decide that I didn't need a husband? Maybe when they guy I was with wasn't "the one". And the guy I wanted cannot be "the one"? Maybe because I realized that Atticus Finch will always be a fictional character and will never cross over to real life. That "the one" does not really exist. And I decided that I'd rather be friends with men than marry a person who is not "the one"?

Is this the negation of self?

Now this contradicts the "Secret Theory". That the world moves with the laws of attraction. Since I've been negating myself of things I used to love, it is the reason why they don't come to me. Hmmmm.

I need an attitude change. I should never deny anything that I want or I will never get them. Ask. Answer. Receive. That's the secret.

So I'm taking everything back. I do will lse weight, I do love jewelry and fancy a Timex, and yes, I would love to marry a guy like Atticus Finch :) Hahaha. So much for attitude.

Heavy!

I seem to be spending more time with friends lately. Went out Saturday to a kids birthday party (with Tinkerbell) and spent the evening catching up with my Catholic buddies who I love dearly for not judging me for giving up religion :)

We spent the night watching the younger generations hobknob (It was a graduation night) with their friends. One thing we agreed that changed when we were their age - girls, wear dresses. I don't know if they did this every night but making me wear a dress at that age was like pulling teeth. Anyway, that was a welcome break from an upcoming busy week.

On April 1, a friend and I decided to spend April Fool's together. The day was not significant to us but I thought I should mention it because ... well, we are in one way or another, "fools" or something like that. So I guess that made us April Fools - and I don't mean that in a bad way ;)

We had sandwiches at the Amigo lobby resto, with huge helpings of 'Death By Chocolate" on the side. We also had native hot choco - yummmmmmm - which was probably the reason why we ended up talking for five hours. Was it not a working day, we would've stayed a bit longer but I've been lacking sleep from asthma attacks lately and hot, hot choco will not go well with my steroid meds. Plus I've gained a total of 6 kilos since 2006. NOT GOOD!

Our talks ranged from past loves, to present loves, to raising kids, to difficult parents and work. My friend was ... is a poet. I've known her for most of my adult life and yet I didn't know this part of her. She willingly shared with me thoughts she wrote and I'm so happy to know that she is finding herself at last and has started to write again.

We analyzed love and duty in all its intricacies. We shared words, that turned into ideas and later convictions. She had questions. Lots of it. And I tried to help with answers but ended up asking more questions. Which wasn't so bad at all. I miss talks like this. And I'm glad we had this night out.

As a final thought, let me quote something I copied from my april fool's buddy ... and I really love this. Something to think about when you have nothing else to do :)

... have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and to try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don't search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.

Rainer Maria Rilke, 1903
in Letters to a Young Poet

Ganda no?

Amen.