The Sweetest Thing

I'm typing this in bed. While encoding data on a table last night I got red-faced and suddenly can't breathe. You know you're overworked when you get asthma attacks while sitting on a table writing. But I finished half of what I was suppose to do last night and collapse in bed when I got home. That was how tired I was. Sometimes I don't know when to quit.

So I called in sick and will be in bed rest the whole morning. If I get better today, I plan to jog at the boulevard tonight for some fresh air. I don't know if that's exactly the cure for asthma, but I do know that I feel better after a jog. I shouldn't have stopped running just because I was working my ass off. It should be a priority but alas, the workload sometimes gets the better of me.

I think the fatigue was also due to a very busy weekend. I attended one party after another. All I really wanted to do was stay home and work but duty calls. Binoy got baptized last Saturday and I was photographer slash godmother. We had a catered lunch at home and since kids were invading my PC, I stopped thinking about work altogether. I devoured Ox Tongue the whole day and nothing else. Gleca's makes a mean mushroom sauce so I just loved the tongue  :) Had a fun time with the family and family friends.

So in the evening, just when things were winding down, my cousin called and invited us to dinner at Olio because her parents were home from the US. So after a short nap, we headed to Smallville again and I had the sweetest native chocolate in Smallville. After brief updates on what's happening to who and who said what, we were in pretty light spirits. so we headed to Nothing But Desserts and had figillato and tea. And I got home full and very sleepy.

Determined to get some work done, I worked all of Sunday and finished a website by nightfall. Then I watched two movies - the ATeam and Salt. Was just about to call it a day when I got an email from a client with some web updates and I decided to work on it until about 2am.

The next morning - Monday, I was useless at work LOL. I was sleepy and since I finished all my workload the week before - I had nothing much to do but watch tutorial videos online. At least I was learning despite being useless and almost comatose. I had to work after six for a project - and that was when the asthma hit like I just swallowed a black boulder and it went right in my left lung. I turned red and well, wasn't feeling dandy. I took puffs on my handy ventolin and swallowed french fries to fight the panic of not being able to breathe. I know it was not the smartest thing to do - but it calmed me a bit. Food is quickest remedy to not feeling well - except when I'm combating acid. Anyway, I finished my overtime work, got home and collapsed in bed with my clothes on.

A friend just reprimanded me that I was doing all work and not enough love life. Sigh. If only I had an option, it would be all love and no work. And I know that would end very badly too. LOL.

I need to keep my balance. I suck at it.

Age of No Reason

When you're falling in love, the first thing that goes is objectivity. Next is reason. Next is common sense. And finally, self-control. 

- From the Yahyah Handbook Chapter 3

I wrote that one. 

Because love has no mission but to fulfill itself.

The Yahyah Handbook does not really exist. It's actually a collection of quotes from friends who had sudden astute awareness during long deep conversations or after a lonely pondering of things that are. That's why quotes like this should be documented on blogs before they disappear into thin air and before the lesson is again lost in memory.

Last night I had dinner with friends at Ramboys. It was a gathering of the broken-hearted and the recovering love addicts and love gurus. I don't exactly know which category I fall into but I was in good company.

The guys had a lot to say about love this time. They claim to have the ability to read women in courtship. They say they know when they "got them" - that we women are quite transparent when it comes to feelings. Hmmmm. I think this however does not apply to all men. Hahaha. Some are just a bit more dense than others when you say NO.

Anyway, one guy-friend said, and take note women everywhere, that if a guy likes you, he will do whatever he can to pursue you. That's the only way to know if a guy likes you. If he doesn't do anything, then he has no interest. Period. Move on. He says that women should wait and not make the first move. The word he used is  "Hunter". Men are the hunters. And are we the prey? Hmmmmm. He also said that the easier women are to woo, the less respect they get from the men who woos them. Or should I say woe instead of woo? So we should give them hell during courtship. Of course, if he loses interest during his hellish experience, he would not be worthy of you. Hehe. Hmmmm.

We agreed that doing something really stupid in love does not necessarily constitute a wrong. Sometimes, we need to be stupid. If for anything else, we need to learn. But sometimes, we just need to be stupid for self-preservation, for sanity and perhaps, for just wanting to be happy. So yup, we are all for stupidity ... but we are also for the wisdom of the consequence of stupidity. So cry all you like when you do something stupid. But be assured that it was your choice so take responsibility for the stupidity and stop blaming others.

All right enough. That is the liempo speaking.

There's more about  rebound relationships :) but that's meant for another Yahyah Chapter  hehe.

Have to get ready for work. Thanks friends. Had a good time last night.

Uh oh, it's my birthday

So I got an email last week of a job offer telling me they would pay me if I would write a novel. Nyahaha. I thought it was a joke but apparently they were not kidding. I said no - well, because a novel takes too much time to write and I'm balancing two jobs and a life. So I was hoping for smaller projects. So they asked me to write short stories - but of course my idea of short stories are the ones people write on blogs - teeheehee. I'm pondering on this opportunity a wee bit longer. I don't think I'm that good a writer but it wouldn't hurt to try. But then again, I don't want the pressure. So I'm sitting on it Ms. Editor.

Before the day ends, I would like to greet this blog Happy 6th Birthday!Yeehee!!! Woooot! Woooot!!!

I was preparing something sentimental for my blog's birthday but I couldn't get to it because it just got too toxic at work and at home.

So let's keep it simple. First, I would like to thank my writer friend in London who got me started writing and for awhile became this blog's sole purpose - LOL. Emphasis on "FOR AWHILE!" Then I would also like to remember my other writer friend in Manila who introduced me to blogging - Vaylazoo! - and now I just cannot stop. Third, I would like to thank all the bloggers I've encountered through these years that have inspired me to formulate my own opinions, ponder on my own existence, be inspired by their writing and just enjoy the chance to get a glimpse about life on every tiny planet in which they live in. And finally, I thank my very few (and I probably can count them with my hands) - and dare I call them - FANS - hahaha - for taking time to drop by and read, and leave comments. Your presence is greatly valued :)

And about that thing I planned for this blog's 6th anniversary. I decided to post links to top ten posts. My criteria for choosing them is ... I didn't have a criteria. I didn't have time to make a criteria. But these are just my favorites. Maybe because I was angst-y when I wrote them. Or maybe I felt the entire post was really really me. Or maybe it just made me laugh. And feel. And you know how I love to feel!

So here it is. My top ten posts.
1. What I Really Feel  2004
2. Morphing Into Spinsterhood 2005
3. We Finally Meet
4. My Room
5.Cruella De Butt
6. My Mondo Beyondo List
7. Proust
8. So It Is
9. Happy Birthday To Me
10. What would you do if you know you can't fail

of mice and men?

While my day job keeps me alive, it is my web bootlegging that keeps me sane. But I love both so I keep both.

Nowadays I have to drag my feet every time I wake up. There's really a big difference between working inspired and passionately and just ... working. I hate not being able to use my head when I toil. I really miss working for a goal that means something to me. I need a vision - wait - I already have a vision but pity that my boss doesn't think it's worth her while. I happen to think that it's a brilliant idea - and I'm not the only one. But she doesn't so life sucks right now. I feel like a walking keyboard at work - all keys, no cpu. I hate doing nothing.

The thing is, people scurry all over the maze at my day job. Some are hiding out inside dirty holes. Others are scampering in panic looking for a bit of cheese - which is quite pathetic to look at. I don't really know which is worse - the attempt to conceal or the blatant display of attention-seeking. I think people should stay still and keep clean. Like white mice, if you're clean enough, eventually someone will give you the cheese you need. If you know your way around the maze long enough, you will also know that those who work hard will be rewarded. And in a maze, there's only one way in and one way out - you just need to figure out the right one.

Ok, so I don't really hate my day job. I do love what I do.

I just hate my boss.

I wonder if I could adopt the puss-in-boots look and ask for better cheese?

Celebrity Autobiography

This is just hilarious. Look through the series. It's quite entertaining.

Eye of the Storm

So it's been a quiet weekend. I'm bracing myself for a chaotic week but I also know I have to stop being lazy. I haven't touched my freelance work folder for quite some time and started working on billing old jobs that I've put off far too long. I'm putting myself back at ODesk and I'm also following up loose ends that haven't quite made it to the finish line. So it's a start - a slow one - but a start. I decided that I will try to limit my freelance workload to 3 hours weekdays and 8 hours weekends. I plan to keep my workout routine for as long as I can. I remembered how I love running - so I hope that it doesn't rain on our Boardwalk days.

I finished reading the Niffenegger books my friend gave me. I read The Time Traveller's Wife a second time and had the urge to draw a timeline for Henry and Clare - something I wanted to do when I first read it. But that means I had to draw not just two but three timelines - Henry's, Clare's and the time travelling Henry's - which would probably end up with a doodling mess on paper. Her Fearful Symmetry is slightly heavy emotionally as all books dealing with afterlife and souls and cemeteries should be. If I had to be locked up as a spirit, I wish to be in a Smithsonian - or the Louvre. Wait, I take that back. I don't think I want to be locked up at all - dead or alive. (Sings aka Nelly Furtado): "I'm like a bird, I only fly away. I don't know where my soul is, I don't know where my home is." Yup, I want to roam free. And if I had to haunt people, I already have a short list of people to haunt (insert deep creepy laughter here). I'll start with my nemesis (Nyahahaha!)

On the lighter side of life, I have found a new gift. I seem to be very good at putting babies to sleep :) I don't know, maybe I'm soooo boring, they just shut their eyes when I start talking or singing. Or maybe they find my arms alike a comfy spa waterbed. Whichever, I can put Tyo Mike to sleep with a bit of crooning and rocking. Of course, once you put him down, he starts belting like Freddie Mercury again. But I really like having a baby in the house. It's true what my married friends say, babies take away stress just by looking clueless and dumb : ) - No, I haven't changed my mind about marriage or babies. I'm too selfish to be a wife or mom. Me likes being girlfriend and Tita until death do us part. Treat me right and I promise not to haunt you in the afterlife - Nyahahaha!

Ok, that's it. Have to go. It's Sunday and I plan to land a freelance job by next weekend before I go broke. Fingers crossed. Ah, the life of starving artists! Haha.

Pictures

I'm making up for all the lost time I should've spent blogging. I have been doing it sparingly but life goes on and does not stop for anyone. I have nothing much to say but here are pics for some quick updates.

1. Baby Pic- The new guy / toy in the house.. We call him Tyo Mike. :) Born two days after the elections, he earned the nickname Binoy. Dark but cuddly in sooo many ways. Grrrr.
2. Books - gifts from baby bro! Finished the Web Design book today. Love it! Recommend it! Must read! I wish all text books were written this way. School would never be boring!
3. Pug - the green pig who made it possible for me to leave for Thailand :D. Butchered him early May I think. Sold him for 2,750 pesos LOL. Enough for the elephant ride and a bit of pasalubong - hahaha.
4. My two remaining pigs - Dodo and Violet :) Dodod currently eats ten peso coins and will take awhile to fatten up. Violet is currently on loan with my nephew Paolo.

Attention Span of a 5 yr old

I was cleaning the mess in my desk this morning and found these:

A speaker once said in a seminar that doodling means your not listening or that you're bored. Then she singled me out and asked me if I was bored. I said "No" and continued doodling. I don't know if I insulted her that way because she kept calling my attention after that. LOL. I'd like to think I heard every word she said.

I think it's her job to keep me interested. If I don't hang on to her every word, maybe she just wasn't that good of a speaker. Haha - gina-justify pa! Anyways, I doodle when listening to people talk. Maybe I'm not just an undiagnosed obsessive-complusive. Maybe I'm autistic too. Hahaha.

I share this bad habit with a couple of siblings and several nieces and nephews. What can I say? Crazy runs in the family.

Quiet

So everything's been quiet and slow around here. I really have nothing to report because I haven't been really doing anything particularly important. Well, a few things here and there but no long term projects for now.

The truth is I've been spending a lot of time feeling good. LOL! I've been running/jogging a lot with my friends. And I have also enrolled myself in a gym :) I don't know if I've told you that before but I'm liking it. I like feeling energized after a workout. I like sweating profusely (LOL) and inhaling huge chunks of fresh air after a sprint.

Am I losing weight? LOL! A bit. Nothing drastic since I still don't want to give up my favorite food but I do choose what I eat. I don't starve myself but I don't reward myself with food either. I am still an emotional eater. But I am losing weight. Not too much. Slow progress. But loving it. Living it. - Us Girls!

It will take me more than 2 years to get to the weight I wanted. But it's not just the goal that is to be enjoyed ... but the journey. : )

Did I tell you that I have fabulously great, supportive and encouraging friends? I do :D

What I like about Bangkok

It's colorful.

It's creative.

Size matters.

Detail does too.

It's modern.

It's old.

It's quite and meditative ...

But fun and noisy at the same time.

Ahhhhh This is what I needed!

If you're good, I believe God will grant your prayers. If you are extra good, he will give you what you need. I love my vacation. I'm having fun. I'm losing weight - although that hasn't been confirmed yet. And I love love love the people I'm with. I promise I will make it a priority to save up for vacations like these. Next time, I wish the whole family would go together. What a blast that would be.

Will post pics soon. For now, I just want the world to know what a great idea this was despite the possibility of a protest, the untimeliness of the situation and the lack of funds.